I will to will and will as I will be me…

I will never quit looking, though my eyes become like
clear glass marbles, or even if sight goes the way of
old bulbs, and is no longer incandescent, or warm with
brilliant comprehension.

I will still see, and cause myself to be seen, though
colors fade from the fabric of love, or even if destiny’s
sun decides the sky is just to hectic a place to arc its
way across.

I will be, and always be, though the hands of the world
can no longer lift to find me, though the body of its entire
population ignores me, though what was solid becomes
transparent like ghosts and confounds me.

I will be the me I have always been, though the struggles
conspire and conflate into armies or single entities seeking
to erase all trace of the steps I have taken – the dance I
have danced, or the love I was made from.

I will taste every morsel, every crumb, though food
becomes as scarce as platinum, or as remote and distant
as helium, describing their textures and every pleasure I
have had in partaking of them.

I will take my time with life, and chew upon it, though
its meaning is no longer thought to be what it once
was, or is no longer celebrated by diners seated at its
elaborate banquet.

I will hear from the valley sound, and the city wail, and
I will form from that a dictionary of language, though it
may produce a poverty of poetry, or describe a paucity
of beautiful ideals.

I will listen to you on behalf of everyone, though song
be gone from your voice, and I will attempt to remind
you, or teach you to remember some once upon a
time resonance.

I will never give up, though I fail. I will never fall down,
though you push me. I will never cease my amazement
though you do, I will never stop, even if reality insist it
is wiser too.

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4 responses to “I will to will and will as I will be me…

  1. I needed this one today. Thank you so much.

    I stopped counting after I sent out resume #100 last week. Nobody is hiring where I live, or at least they’re not hiring me. Here I am, over 35, getting elbowed out by kids for a lousy job at Wal-Mart. Feeling sorry for myself.

    THEN I saw your poem. I love the determination, the unwillingness to give up. I doubt applying for jobs is what you intended (ha), but the poem gives me strength to get up and do it all over again tomorrow. Thank you so much.

    Structurally, as always, it’s beautiful. It’s my new favorite poem of yours, obviously because the theme touches me so deeply. I won’t give up on living of life, either, which is what I think you intend. Touching, sensing, and feeling all the beauty and pain…and writing about it! Beautiful, Poetman.

  2. Julie – I am glad that this little poem was what you needed, I know that I needed to write it – will need to read it from time to time, lest I forget its central message…ya know, I do sometimes want to give up on this blog thing…not the writing of course, just the blogging, and the waiting for approbation from the world of poetry…

    Poe Man

  3. this in fact reminds me of my favorite quote “it is not falling down that is failure,it is the refusin to get up…”
    no matter how strong we might pretend to appear from the outside of our being we lie weak some or the other corner near some fragile bone deep inside.In such times we surely need such encouraging words.It all seems a mere act but the fact is that we do need words…”may produce a poverty of poetry, or describe a paucity”
    there comes a time after all your sufferings where GOD(or any other force you believe in..or you don’t believe in) stops testing you..”here you are take your reward,had you given up that day i you would never have seen me…”

    keep writing(pleas dont give up blogging) i love your poem…

  4. Narendra – Thanks for coming, and for your comments. As for the need for words, yes perhaps…however some of my most favorite moments have come after an event has left me speechless with awe…but later of course, I do seem to write about it one way or another…

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